The Patience of a Saint!

Me:  I have the patience of a saint

Co-worker: laughs outrageously

Me:  What?

Co-worker: YOU have patience?

Me:  *sighs* Yes, I have all kinds of patience!  *said with 0 patience*

Nobody says anything for about 5 seconds

Me:  Ok, maybe not… But have you met my family?

-Wren

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Well, Shit. I Started a Blog.

I've made some questionable decisions before, but this one takes the cake.   I've officially started a blog.   Apparently, people don't always appreciate hearing my lack of delicate sensibilities out loud.  So, having this amazing wit, my gloriously sarcastic observations and wildly inappropriate thoughts that - typically - I say out loud.... is just not enough!  Now, we have this fucking website to release them into the world.  What could possibly go wrong? Welcome to Wren's Unsolicited Thoughts , where the filter is broken, the humor is occasionally inappropriate, and bullshit tolerance?  Nonexistent. Before we go any further, there are a few things you should know.  I have opinions - lots of them.  Some are thoughtful and insightful.  Others probably should have stayed between me and the shampoo bottles in the shower.   I have a dark sense of humor.  Not because I don't take life seriously, but because sometimes li...
Read more

I Tried Being Less Wasteful. It Was Horrible

 I don’t know about you, but I absolutely cannot stand it when the shampoo and conditioner get empty at different times!  I have this need to start new bottles of both at the exact same time.  Am I the only person who does this?  Do I need some sort of measuring device to wash my fucking hair? Anyway, happy Monday! -Wren
Read more

The Obituary

 When I die, please don't say, "She was such a joy! She just lit up any room she walked into," at my funeral. We all know that's not true AT ALL. Let's not start lying now that I'm dead. — Wren Merritt
Read more